One to One Coaching
I offer free 30 minute telephone/Skype consultations for people wanting to find out more about coaching on the 'baby decision'. Email me at mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org and assistant Laura will respond and arrange an appointment with you. Visit http://www.ticktockcoaching.co.uk/ for more information about my coaching services.
Saturday, 19 April 2014
In addition to my life coaching work, I also run Leadership Embodiment workshops in London, England. This is an approach which can help you deal with stress, develop your confidence and find ways to recover to your centre. My next workshop is running on June 6th (day one) and July 4th (day two) - for more info and to book go here: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/leadership-embodiment-conscious-embodiment-workshop-fundamentals-tickets-10971755817?aff=es2&rank=0
Thursday, 17 April 2014
If you are struggling with the decision to have children or be childfree, holidays such as Easter which tend to be focused on children and families can be difficult. Clients report that they can feel marginalized at family occasions if they don't have children and for those people who do want children but feel that their circumstance prevents this, it can be painful to have people at family occasions ask when they will have children. I work with clients to find ways to deal with these situations - usually through finding ways to 'recover to our centre'. This can be done by simple breath work and through imagining that there is a little more emotional distance between us and whatever is triggering us to feel badly. If you are going to be at a big family gathering this weekend, take a moment and imagine that you are surrounded by a bubble of energy. Anytime some distant relative asks an intrusive personal comment, imagine their words are landing in the bubble - not in you! And make sure you arrange some time over the weekend to do something you enjoy - that creates space for you to look after and nuture you!
Monday, 14 April 2014
I recently worked with a client who said that, while she had never had a strong desire to have a baby, she did often think that she would love to have older or grown up children around her when she is older. One of the options we explored was adoption and fostering. You can adopt and foster as an older person - indeed you can adopt over 50 as long as there is no more than 10 years between you and the child you adopt. In the Uk, there is a moving TV programme about adoption. It is definitely an option well worth considering. For my client, knowing that this could be possible in 10 years time, made her current situation (where having a child would be difficult due to circumstances) http://www.channel4.com/programmes/15000-kids-and-counting/4od
Monday, 7 April 2014
Some moms in the US talk about how they made the decision to have their baby in this advice column.
Thursday, 3 April 2014
This is absolutely hilarious! If you need some light relief, check this fab cartoon out!
Wednesday, 2 April 2014
It's not often that the shadow side of motherhood gets talked about but many women who do decide to have children find the early years tiring and tedious. This article talks about the reality of parenting a young baby. In my coaching work, I think it's invaluable to look at all aspects of motherhood - the negative side included.
Monday, 31 March 2014
This was just published today showing that the number of babies born to women over 50 has doubled in the last four years. As fertility treatments become more effective, older women are able to have children later in life as they delay the decision to have children for many reasons.
Sunday, 23 March 2014
One of the things I have said over the years that one of the un-intended consequences of having so many more options in our lives - and of being able to make a viable choice to be Childfree is that it ironically makes the decision to have children or not much harder than for the women who came before us. I would hate to return to pre- feminist days but we have to deal with how we make this choice in the complex world we live in today. Here is an interesting talk and look at the problematic nature of choice in the modern world.
Thursday, 13 March 2014
I found this advice column today on the above issue. I do disagree with most of the advice given - although I do agree it's important to ask your partner about his worries and concerns. I think that at 29 and having lived together for three years, it's perfectly reasonable to say to a partner that you would like to start trying for a child. However, it is true that turning the issue into a conflict can push the person who is unsure about wanting children away. A better approach, in my opinion having working with women in this very situation would be to suggest a break from the discussion and a return to contraception for a set period - say 6 months. But then say that at the end of this period, a frank discussion about the future of the relationship and having children will need to be had.
Tuesday, 11 March 2014
Monday, 3 March 2014
Just wanted to mention a great blog called Childless by Marriage - it is specifically for people whose partners are unable to have children or who do not want children. Sue, who writes the blog has also written an ebook - available on Amazon. I've been aware of Sue's work for a while and I think it's so important. As I've mentioned before, I see a number of clients in this situation and it is a very difficult place to be. The more people like Sue are writing and talking about his issue the better as it can make people in the situation feel very along.
Tuesday, 25 February 2014
Here's an interesting blog post where six men who have decided to be childfree are interviewed. Men who decide to be childfree are less discussed then women so I think it's very interesting to hear their perspective for a change.